Well Lately Ive Realize Im Losing My Drive In Many Things In General But My Mayor Victims Of It Surprises Me.Also Things I Thought Where Secondary Has Grown Larger.

One. The Negatives -

My Art:
Well My Drawings,Sketches,Painting,Coloring And Much More Is Declining As My Drive To Do So Is Fading And I Can Not Find Something To Focus On Like A Theme Or Style To Get Attach To,Whats Strange Is My Inner Tagger/Grafettist Is Starting To Break Threw.

My Writting:
It Seems My Story And General Will And Rush Of Writting Is Declining As Well As I Can Really Restore My Flow Of Written Word,
I Can Create a Idea To Write About But I Eventually Collapses On Its Self, Which Leads Me To Want To Feed A Old Urge, Doing Folklore , Lol Yes Sounds Funny Right? Doing Disney Happy Stories? Well More On The Lines Of Old Gothic/German Morbid Tales.

Emotions:
Beginning To Become More Cold And Dead Inside Again As Good Friends And Someone I Thought Would Be A Good Girlfriend Killed My Joys,Leaving Me Thinking Of Angry Acts Of Justice.

Two. The Postives +

Life.
Im Balancing My Life Of Work And Fun Now, Setting My Morals like If They Where The Ten Commandments Or Something.I Finally Found My Inner Craving From People, Just Respect, I Dont Need Anything Else.

Politics.
My Brains Expanding Further Into This Subject,Reading Old History From Templars To Corruption In Old Days, My Inner Revolutionist Is Opening Up Like Che Guevara Traveling Threw Latin America.My Demand For More Political Knowledge Is Bigger Then The Stimulus Plan.

Music:
Ive Finally Started Tapping The Better Guitarist Crying Out To Let Free Now, As I Continue Bringing My Guitar Everywhere, Doing Chores,Melodies,Alternate Picking And Much More.

Friends.
Ive Narrowed My Scope Of Trusted People And Seem To Be Bettering My Self Threw It, Althought Some My Age With Some High IQ Would Be A Nice To Bounce Back To,Or A Actual " Real " Girlfriend But Hey If I Can Be Happy With A Handful Or Two Of Friends That Would Just Icing On The Cake.

Dwellings:
As I Adjusting My Surroundings Things Are Being More Calm And Mellowing in And Its Helping Reduce The Craziness Abit,Trying To Live Back In The 90's Scene Of That Orange Chill Filter With Real Rap,Life Was Just Life , No Major Fads And Good Films And Chiller Media.

NEEDS:
My Only Favorite Twins (Dragon Fetus Clones Lol)Oh Do I Miss The Times Of Mellow Chilling And Ranting Humor From Them.Allie,Only Girl I'd Be Willing To Put A Ring On Her Finger For Her Neverending Care When Life Is Horrid.New Killswitch Engage/NIN/KoRn Album To Destill
My Thoughts On.Some Support Not Downer Of My Actions.Some To Read Thats NOT FREAKING TWILIGHT BS! ...Sorry.My Old Now College Attending Friend Who Where The Real People That I Had In My Life.Some Cash In My Pocket.Some Hope.Time, More Of It,A Marial Art That I Could Attend That Isnt So Far Away.A Better Diet.Some Love From Somewhere.A Nice Bed/Better Posture.A Nice None Limit To The Valley/L.A To Just Kick Back On.A Good Calm Slow Meal Without Hectic Problems.Maybe A Good Cry Out To Something To Relieve Me.Smile To Look Forward.

, A Hug With A Smile And Kiss By Woman I Want To Hold, And Let Everything Go With,Because There Intellect Can Go Around It And Dedicate To Well Benivolent Action

Most Importantly , A Refuel Meant Of Some Spritual Feeling,Because God Used To Be My NOS (Nitro Oxide System) And I Want That Back,Living A Sinner's Path Has Cut Me Back So Much.